I’m having a blast as an erotic romance author. I’m exploring all kinds of kink I never knew turned me on. Spanking, bondage, dominance and submission, ménage, woooohoooo! I can and will continue to explore alternative and explicit sexuality. It is incredibly affirming to me as a woman to create sexy stories. In my story Within Reach at Liquid Silver, my heroine is a whore. So in the course of my research, I wanted to look at a contemporary brothel. For women.
Imagine my consternation when I discover that Nevada’s legalized prostitution laws are entirely written in the feminine. There is not. One. Male. Brothel. I cannot find one through a decent internet search in the US, Jamaica, the Netherlands, Germany, or Spain. If you’re gay, there’s murmurs of male servicing clubs. If you want a private male escort, there’s rumors. Heidi Fleiss had designs on creating a legal “stud farm”, but her drug habit got in the way.
So I’m curious. For argument’s sake, let’s set aside the humanist stand point that prostitution turns people into commodities, creates questionable consent situations, and has an ugly history of being a step away from slavery. Let’s try to assume that modern prostitution is by choice, regulated for abuse, and recognizes human sexuality as a healthy activity. If we look at legal brothels as opportunities, what does it say about our culture that open sexuality is only presented to hetero men?
Personally, I was appalled. Forget about my disappointment, lol. I was PISSED. Men can buy a woman’s services, but women can’t buy a man’s. Some of the arguments I saw while exploring were things like, “Men are easy. No sense paying them. Just go to a bar.” Then there was the statement that women are more emotional (read better) and so wouldn’t want impersonal (read inferior) sex. I guess if we’re never given the choice to be aggressive, expressive sexual creatures, we only ever want committed, domestic sex?
I just can’t fathom this. There are no highly visible male brothels in the western world. Is it a sign that women are a more decent gender? Or of a society that still oppresses women’s sexuality? Then I began to see parallels with how erotic romance is (lowly) perceived by the industry. Hmmm. So, smut book readers unite! Buy those dirrrty sexy fantasies and indulge those mental sexual escapades. Cause you can’t get them in the flesh.
Mima is a happily married New Yorker with a sweet, tiny black cat. Chat with her December 12th at Mary Winter’s from 7-9pm EST and enjoy contests for free books, gifts, and rune readings. Check out her books, reviews, and excerpts at mimawithin.com.
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December 5th, 2008 at 12:46 am
Not a single brothel for women? An outrage indeed. I’ll help the cause by buying more romantica books then
December 7th, 2008 at 10:56 am
Mima if you find one let me know, I’ll help you with the research.
December 7th, 2008 at 11:18 am
There are plenty of that kind of service over here in the UK. I would imagine that there are plenty in other countries, especially on the continent. Perhaps not so obvious as a knocking shop because I think that most women are a little more fastidious about who’s bed they shag in, and who’s sheets – but “escorts” are available just about everywhere.
I found these links
http://www.femalefirst.co.uk/celebrity/Heidi+Fleiss-7264.html
http://books.google.co.uk/books?hl=en&id=JAYeUUoqw20C&dq=male+brothels&printsec=frontcover&source=web&ots=QIiO19cxEi&sig=WPCOxagDlajb6ynaoHzu6ZBeCMc&sa=X&oi=book_result&resnum=11&ct=result
Regards
Erastes
http://www.erastes.com
December 7th, 2008 at 1:30 pm
Saw the notice on Samhain Cafe loop and hopped over.
There is still a double standard–not just in this country, and I’d say that the heart of this lies in SEX. Gender and the act of. Men can have it; Women can’t.
On the other hand, IMO, women are definitely the more evolved gender . . .
Julie
P.S. Love your kitty picture
December 7th, 2008 at 2:52 pm
Erastes, the heidi fleiss never came to fruition. even without her drug habit, it looks like the existing
industry and politicians would have fought her hard. as for escorts, that’s not what i’m talking about.
sure, you can find someone to call and go out with. i absolutely AM interested in a place a woman
can go to for a shag. i would want it to be a professional establishment where i could trust the sheets
as well as general hygiene, yes.
Julie, omg, you looked at my webpage. you have no idea how ridiculously happy that made me.
yes, i am a sad sack. i had that done up on a whim, and wish i had legs like that!
December 7th, 2008 at 4:48 pm
Great, interesting blog, Mima! I had always just assumed Nevada had some male brothels, but that they simply weren’t mentioned much because the female ones were far more popular. Brothels are legal there. What a bummer that Nevada doesn’t have any brothels with men for sale! Totally unfair!
December 7th, 2008 at 9:09 pm
But of course! It’s always interesting to ‘meet’ new people.
BTW, my music tastes vary as well, from Bach to Metallica
(whom I sadly missed out on seeing when they were in N.O. recently for a concert).
I did see them, though, about 10 years ago when they came to Lafayette, LA.
Can you please send out a reminder about your Dec. 12 chat on the Samhain Cafe loop?
Thanks, Julie
December 7th, 2008 at 10:25 pm
Just wanted to let you know that I used your blog today in my local writing group challenge. Here’s my copy and paste:
HeartLa Dec. challenge—Letter of the Day
B = Blog, Bordello, bold, brassy
Bold and brassy Blog site titles, such as Mary Winter’s “Bordello Fantasies” posted today, encourage readers and other writers to visit an author’s website, thereby encouraging communication between the parties and, hopefully, enhancing an author’s audience.
Julie
December 7th, 2008 at 10:49 pm
I’m happy to have the extra pimpage Julie. I’ll def do some promotion for the chat. Thanks for the reminder.
December 8th, 2008 at 5:54 pm
Thanks. It just so happened to fit in perfectly with the letter of the day challenge, which is to write a sentence using a WRITING RELATING word starting with the day’s designated letter. I mean, how perfect was that?! Just send out a reminder on the Samhain loop, and hopefully, I’ll be free that day. Julie
December 8th, 2008 at 6:23 pm
Oops that’s Writing RelatED. Was thinking of my Writing Group and jumped ahead of myself